This post is dedicated to all the people who miss a special person in their life.
Losing a person close to you is never a pleasure, it will hurt for eternity even if you have thousands of friends, hundreds of close ones, and a few really close who would do their best to keep your mind away from pain. But practical reality is that nothing is permanent. It takes us a long time to realize it.(took me 12 years!) All we can do is to keep them alive with us in the best possible way, and somehow through that space, we see they do try to live with us.
I ve been missing my dad really bad for the past three weeks, horribly bad. Although I have an adorable mom, a mom is a mom, and dad is dad. It would be silly of me to ask her to be like him, which she is not made/meant to be. So there has been a lot of silence in the house from my side, and a lot of sound from her trying to pull me out.
So I decided yesterday that I have to break it open and go out. I went out for a walk, and then for a run in the gym (Didn't go for either today, taking my weekend off even for that. How sad can I be), and felt much better, in continuation, today I cleaned my room. Believe me it was so messy and I was not yet in peace with myself that I actually googled "how to clean your room". Life can get that pathetic. I cleaned a major portion of my room, and it now looks livable. I then decided that I am going to the grocery shop (its not even a proper super market) that I ve always fancied shopping. (For some strange reason, I like grocery shopping the most. It perhaps talks about my quality/nature/character that I am more a home bunny).
I went there, and spent about half an hour, a duration which is generally not permitted, and bought a very few things for my own absolute necessities, somethings for the house in general, some things for my mom, and some absolutely useless things (er.. dont think i bought too many things.. all put together would sum upto 15 items at the max, and I spent half an hour for it. Imagine!)
I enjoyed every bit of staring at everything in the shop, all the things in the market on the way to the shop.
As I came home, I realized that I now had things to reduce the available space in the room which I cleaned in the morning. But in a short while, the room looked exactly like what my dad's room would look like. A computer table cleaned regularly, and well organized, goodies stacked in a corner, just sufficiently well lit, cozy and very daddy.
Moral: I felt that dad reached out to me only when I made an attempt to go out and set things right for myself, and make sure I bring him on a positive note. If you are missing that specialness of that person who has left you, it is all up to you to to keep them with you. There are many other banal things that I miss, I am sure in a while I will either get over them, or get them over!
Wishing all the people out there fighting hard against depression, a successful way out
Love and peace !
Losing a person close to you is never a pleasure, it will hurt for eternity even if you have thousands of friends, hundreds of close ones, and a few really close who would do their best to keep your mind away from pain. But practical reality is that nothing is permanent. It takes us a long time to realize it.(took me 12 years!) All we can do is to keep them alive with us in the best possible way, and somehow through that space, we see they do try to live with us.
I ve been missing my dad really bad for the past three weeks, horribly bad. Although I have an adorable mom, a mom is a mom, and dad is dad. It would be silly of me to ask her to be like him, which she is not made/meant to be. So there has been a lot of silence in the house from my side, and a lot of sound from her trying to pull me out.
So I decided yesterday that I have to break it open and go out. I went out for a walk, and then for a run in the gym (Didn't go for either today, taking my weekend off even for that. How sad can I be), and felt much better, in continuation, today I cleaned my room. Believe me it was so messy and I was not yet in peace with myself that I actually googled "how to clean your room". Life can get that pathetic. I cleaned a major portion of my room, and it now looks livable. I then decided that I am going to the grocery shop (its not even a proper super market) that I ve always fancied shopping. (For some strange reason, I like grocery shopping the most. It perhaps talks about my quality/nature/character that I am more a home bunny).
I went there, and spent about half an hour, a duration which is generally not permitted, and bought a very few things for my own absolute necessities, somethings for the house in general, some things for my mom, and some absolutely useless things (er.. dont think i bought too many things.. all put together would sum upto 15 items at the max, and I spent half an hour for it. Imagine!)
I enjoyed every bit of staring at everything in the shop, all the things in the market on the way to the shop.
As I came home, I realized that I now had things to reduce the available space in the room which I cleaned in the morning. But in a short while, the room looked exactly like what my dad's room would look like. A computer table cleaned regularly, and well organized, goodies stacked in a corner, just sufficiently well lit, cozy and very daddy.
Moral: I felt that dad reached out to me only when I made an attempt to go out and set things right for myself, and make sure I bring him on a positive note. If you are missing that specialness of that person who has left you, it is all up to you to to keep them with you. There are many other banal things that I miss, I am sure in a while I will either get over them, or get them over!
Wishing all the people out there fighting hard against depression, a successful way out
Love and peace !
No comments:
Post a Comment